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Hi, I’m Jessica and I help adoptive moms become better equipped for the demands of parenting children with a history of trauma.  I give you the tools and support you need to have a more peaceful homelife so you can find time for that Saturday night bubble bath.

Right now, I bet what you need is to take a few deep breaths, relax your shoulders and quiet your mind because I know what you've been dealing with all day.  

     It’s 10pm on Friday night and your kids are finally asleep.  You collapse on the sofa with your head still spinning and your heart still racing.  You just endured two hours of your son screaming, punching and spitting on you during a rage.  You had simply asked your son to put away the toys he had been playing with.  After denying the mess was his and refusing to pick up the toys, you asked him to take a break in his room.  This is when he started to escalate.  

     You promised your daughter you would bake cookies with her tonight but that never happened.  She’s been hiding out in her room all this time.  You can’t believe this chaos is your life.  You thought parenting was supposed to involve fun family outings and warm feelings of connection toward your child but tonight you're just feeling numb.  You feel completely drained and “cared out.”

You’ve probably tried some traditional parenting methods:

  • Reward charts

  • Time-outs

  • Love and Logic

  • Loss of privileges

  • Parenting to your child’s chronological age level

These approaches likely made things worse because they didn’t take into account the effects that trauma has had on your child’s brain development.

Maybe you’ve even tried some trauma informed parenting approaches and interventions that have felt like they solved a piece of the puzzle:

  • Time-ins

  • Attachment building strategies

  • Counseling

  • Medications

  • Occupational therapy

So why are you still feeling so alone, so burnt out, so disconnected to your child, and at a loss as to how to manage their behavior?

Here's what I've found to be true based on my on own parenting journey:

 It’s not until you make some major shifts in yourself that you can become the secure base for your child.  Only after you embrace your own healing, deepen your understanding of trauma and get serious about self-care, will you have the capacity to offer deep tools of healing.

     I know what it’s like to live each day in survival mode, just waiting for the next shoe to drop.  You feel emotionally drained by your child’s behaviors, physically exhausted and completely alone, because who could possibly understand the crazy dynamics inside your home?  I know what it’s like to wake up each morning and feel like your day is another marathon to run.

     

The catalyst for my own personal parenting makeover was a health crisis that revealed my body was stuck in a state of stress. 

 

As I began to prioritize self-care and experience healing in my own nervous system, I was able to face family challenges from a more grounded and compassionate place.  I have personally experienced how much more manageable life is with these 3 principles which I help my clients with:

  1. The foundation of a strong support system​

  2. The parenting approach of a lifelong learner

  3. The shift in focus from behaviors to connection

My 11 year journey of parenting three adopted children has driven me to understand all I can about trauma, brain science and attachment theory.  I’ve spent years devouring any book or podcast on these subjects.  I’ve also invested countless hours in counseling which has given me a deeper understanding of the unique dynamics at play in adoptive families.  

 

My holistic approach starts with helping moms with emotional regulation, making self-care a priority, setting up support systems and learning to break unhealthy parenting patterns.  I then help moms help their children by introducing methods to build deeper connections as well as exploring trauma parenting strategies.  

As a certified health coach I can provide tools to explore dietary and lifestyle shifts that enable moms to build greater stress resilience.  My background in Recreational Therapy can assist moms in incorporating meaningful games and activities into family life to create stronger bonds of connection.

My family still has its challenges, but I don’t feel so blindsided by them anymore. I have realistic expectations for my children and myself. I have a healthy perspective on what is outside of my control and what areas I have influence on. I have had success implementing trauma informed parenting approaches when done in conjunction with my own stress management routines. I enjoy a close relationship with my teen children and am a more stable, centered mom.

Fun Facts About Me

  • I have a musical memory and can sing the lyrics to just about any pop song from the 80’s or 90’s.  Unfortunately, my memory is not so great when I’m walking down the grocery store aisle trying to remember that item that I’m out of but forgot to write on my list.

  • As a toddler I spent an entire summer camping out of a VW bus with my family of four while my dad built the log cabin my siblings and I were raised in.  Luckily it only rained one day that summer, so I made the entire forest my playroom.

  • I live in the Pacific Northwest and enjoy anything outdoors:  camping, hiking, and cross-country skiing.  For years now, I've bribed my kids with candy, stops at the ice cream shop anything to get them out in nature with me.

If you're interested in learning more:

Meaghan's Testimonial

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